Dear Rob Brezsny,

Thank you for your hilarious/sometimes sadly spot on horoscope column that appears each week in my copy of City Weekly.

Just FYI, I have flung rice on myself every day since I read your column for the first time this September.

Yours truly,


Here are some of my fave from this fall:

But like, what do these even MEAN? Read your horoscope here: Free Will Astrology.

What is and what will be.

“It would be an excellent time for you to elope, even if you do so with the person to whom you’re already mated. You might also consider the possibility of wearing a wedding dress everywhere you wander, even if there is no marriage ceremony in your immediate future, and even if you’re a man. And if neither of those ideas appeals to you, please at least do something that will symbolize your intention to focus on intimacy with an intensified sense of purpose. Fling rice at yourself. Seek out someone who’ll give you lessons in how to listen like an empathetic genius. Compose and recite vows in which you pledge to become an utterly irresistible and reliable ally.”

City Weekly + Daily Utah Chronicle REALLY cracked me up this week.

Get your free will astrology here.